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Seventh Year Journey To Scotland

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Journey To Scotland

A visit Or an Invasion?

 

 

Journey To Scotland....A Visit Or An Invasion?

Most of the VWF family are already here, gathered around the huge table in the VWF Headquarters, excitedly discussing where we would go on our yearly adventure vacation. "I'm wantin' to visit Chrissy, says Steve!"... as he shot us his slow southern smile.....and besides "we've never been to Scotland". Bev raps her staff on the table to get everyone to quieten down. Danny agrees adding that Aletta's husband Clarence told him that he had some relatives living there that he would like to revisit also. Wildman sits with the two front legs of his chair up in the air....staring up at the ceiling. A great big mischievous grin on his face and a noticeable twinkle in his eyes that could only mean trouble. A show of hands and it was decided that we would go to Scotland.

Don takes the podium beside Jo and Bev and begins to explain how we will arrive in Scotland. He pulls out a palm sized blue stone, marked with runes on all four sides. A Rather mysterious looking stone for sure. He explains that he found it in an old junk store while looking for parts for his ham radio base. He tells us that the stone is from Scotland and is said to have teleportation capabilities. In his research he found that this wizard stone is very rare indeed and was lost by a high ranking wizard more than a century ago.

Jo stands up and says, " Okay, okay! It's decided! We'll leave from here in 30 minutes, long enough for Don to check out his weather instruments and off we go bound for Chrissy's castle in Winsomedale on Piddletrent. I hope by then that everyone else has arrived or we will have to leave without them.

Exactly thirty minutes later, as we all stand in a circle, Don gently rubs his hands acrost the stone and then taps it four times.....Good grief he yells.....somethig is not working here! Nothing seemed to happen. With Don's face now red, he tells us he forgot one important thing and that we would soon be on our way. Having said that, he spits on the rock and POOF!!! With a loud pop and not an especially smooth landing, we all materialize in the center of a Spring Fair. All around us are brightly colored tents, music coming from a row of children's games and a merry-go-round. In front of Steve is a brightly colored harlequin printed tent, glowing in the bright sunlight. It has a palm on the sign. Hey! It's a Wizard's tent! I'm going in to have my fortune told...says Steve as he pops his head under the tent flap. As he enters, his eyes lock with the tall slender Wizardess whose green eyes aglow seem to draw him nearer to her. "Welcome Steve, you've come to have your palm read, futures divined, to know your role in this time and place"...Steve feels himself pulled forward to the chair just across the table from the Wizardess. As she takes his hands into her own, she feels a fire burn in her stomach...in the corner of her mind she thinks..."Darn! I knew I shouldn't have eaten that second taco.!!" Then she feels the electricity flow through her into Steve. As she watches from a far distance inside herself, Kat sees her hands travel up his arms, across his shoulders and to his knees, his feet and Steve's eyes are huge and round...as he falls backward he cries out..."Angel Kat!" And falls into a not so peaceful sleep. Steve in a dream like state by now saw visions of a shrunken head ...what does this all mean? Oh not again, surely not again. He dreams he is awake only to find the wizardess Standing over him ...or is it a dream? "Well, yes Steve Kat was here but I have her hidden, safely locked away for now...A smile lights up her face as Steve's body now shrinks ever smaller by the minute leaving him no more than three feet tall as he lays on the ground, out cold. In Angel Kat's mind she hears the laughter of her mischievious other self and knows she's trapped in her body by black magic and her Evil Twin Wizardess Bratt the Brit has taken over once again. Steve abruptly awakes and runs out of the tent a much shorter Steve and as fast as his tiny feet can take him....As a much shorter Steve runs head first into Danny and falls to his kilted fanny. Danny takes one look at Steve and says, "DAMN Bro! What happened to you?!" Steve looks at BBB (Bad to the Bone Bill) and WHF (What's His Face, Dave the Wildman) and says Angel Kat....she needs our help! She's done it again"......who did? Kat? Kat did this to you? I'm confused bro, says Danny, maybe you need to just rest your small self, ER, sorry bout that, as he quietly laughs to himself at seeing such a site. No, no says Steve, not Kat really but ...it was Kat....but ... he stuttered....Oh I'm just so confused! Never mind Steve, it;s ok.....says Danny.....no need to explain.

Bev, still trying to recover from her time warp lag, crawls up to itty bitty Steve and asked, "what the heck happened???" Steve looking rather pale said "I went to see the Wizardess to have my fortune read.. and besides for her taco breath.. she touched my hand my whole body began to

tingle! It was Kat asking for help...seems this wicked wizard butt has Kat in hiding and we have to try to find her. All of a sudden Steve was mortified when he saw Danny didn't have any underwear on under his kilt. He yelled! "DANNY!!! good grief man, what's the matter with you?.. you've been watching too much Britney on TV" Aletta and Marti are laughing so hard tears are running down their faces. Pam, not surprised at all from this bad behavior is grinning from ear to ear, says, "I swear we can't take these guys anywhere and yells at Danny please go find some underwear to put on or at least some LEAVES!!! Wildman and bad Bill take a quick look just to make sure they didn't forget their underwear as well...whew!...they wipe their brow with relief and look at each other with an evil grin. Okay Pam says...enough playing around we need to see what we can do for Kat now listen very carefully....................

Of course they were both really surprised by what happened and so they
decided to get all the saints rounded up and figure out what to do next. So
out of the tent they went to get everyone together and back to the tent to
figure out what to do next. It didn't take much time and all the saints were
assembled in front of the tent looking at tiny Steve wondering how to make
him big again. So they decided to head back into the tent to see if they
could figure it out. Well the tent was empty so they all headed inside and
once they were all inside who appeared but the wizardess. Such a beauty with
mesmerizing eyes. The saints were rooted to the spot and little did they
know all the good girls were watching their every movement.

"Why am I small? I didn't do anything wrong" says Steve. "Oh but you did"
said the Wizardess. " Now that you are all here you all will meet the same
fate for 24 hours." As they started to run the saints found their feet were
stuck fast to the floor and they had no way to move.

The wizardess looked at all of them and shrunk them down to 3 feet complete
with kilts and bagpipes. The saints shook in disbelief.

Bev and Jo our fearless leaders appeared and the Wizardess said "Now you
must each watch one saint for 24 hours. The secret to making them full size
again is out in the fair and they must find it without your help. You must
keep an eye on them at all times because there are many pitfalls
that could happen to them out there."

So out you go to explore the spring fair and to seal your fate. If you each
do not find the answer to make you full size you will forever be 3 feet
tall with kilts and bagpipes.........

First of all it will take two of us a piece on each of these kilted saints! So we'll put these Electronic ankle monitors on them...be sure to lock them tight enough or these guys will slip out and wreak havoc on the population! And, keep the monitors clipped to your bikini tops at all times. We have to look for clues and figure out how to help our buddy Kat! I need to get together with Marti, Betty,Jo, Bev, the Deb's and PJ for a quick meeting to figure out how we are going to get Kat out of this and the saints back into their regular sized boots!

PJ and Aletta are walking around inside the tent...Hey! Look at this says PJ. Taking out tweezers she says, It looks like a little round spring! Kinda reminds me of that spring inside a pen. Aletta says, look over there...there's a big old boot with a note on it! Jo picks up a small piece of cloth, this looks like part of a tartan plaid. Says Jo. I bet whoever is messing with us is from that Clan! Now, all we have to do is figure out where to find that plaid clan information. Betty walks over and picks up the boot. These have to be clues for the guys to follow in order to grow up a bit...ha ha ha...no offense guys! Betty says. Clarence, Dick, Don, Bob, Bill, Dave and Steve stand there as Danny shifts his foot around in the dust and just growls at Betty. Steve hands Danny a Sporran to put on the front of his kilt. Betty opens the note and reads.......

"Never fear, Never worry, Help's coming In a hurry

All the guys are screaming "Run! Run as fast as your short legs will carry you!" All the ladies (and they are genuine ladies!) try to hold onto the guys but know they are secure because of the monitors! They look to see what has scared the men (Wildman is as white as his cute socks with the plaid trim!).

Jo screams: "It's the Loch Ness Monster in the moat." Betty and Marti's faces are the same color as Daves, Bev still has jet lag and her reactions are slow, the two Debs just stare and Aletta can't believe what she is seeing. PJ and Pam yell "There's someone riding on top of the Loch Ness monster, he looks familiar!"

"Ladies, I have come to the rescue and to find Kat. Gentleman, if it is in my power I will try to help you but me thinks you had this one coming! On our last trip, I was left behind and had to find my own way out. This time I brought Nessie and know I will get out for sure!"

Dick says "Is that you, Paul Bunyan? Sure looks like Paul Bunyan to me!"

The Saints yell "Help us, Paul! You're one of us! Help us!"

Paul says "I can barely see you! What happened to you guys! And where's Kat? I am here because the ladies need me! I am staying right where I am...you aren't going to leave me behind again!"

Deb B. screams "I found another note!"

"Pay attention- This is the Clan!  There are cluesTo solve our plan."

The gals huddle to figure out what their next move must be. The guys appear helpless in their 'little' circle as they try to figure out how they can get out of the mess they are in. Jo tells the gals to cover the grounds, bridge, bank, and castle to look for these clues, that somehow they'll find Kat, and they will get that tour through the castle!

Tanya who is by the huge doors leading into the castle yells "I think this is a clue! It has to be! I just don't know what it is!"

All of a sudden out of nowhere they hear bagpipes. What is that song they are playing.......

Goodness, they must have spied our saintly ones, because it is "Kelsey’s Wee Reel" that can be heard floating out from the castle. Hee hee hee…..

Steve had been so startled by the site of the Loch Ness monster that he was frantically searching and reaching around all of the folds of his kilt, trying to lay his hands on his dirk. He normally carries it in a loop at his waist, but in the cold temps today, he seems to have misplaced it…….. Well thank goodness he still has his stick to wave around for protection, but as soon as he realizes that it is Paul on top of the Nessie he starts cheering loudly!! For it seems the words in the first note have come true. "Never fear, Never worry, Help’s coming in a hurry!"

Although I fear Paul has not come to save the Saints as they had

hoped. With a nod of his head, Paul turns the Nessie and looks in over

the top of the castle walls and spies a brief flash of color and declares

he thinks he just caught a glimpse of Kat…….but what was she

wearing??? Ladies, was Kat’s wearing a bikini?? All the saintly ones,

chimed in with the answer quite loudly!!!!! Of course, they would have

been paying attention to that detail.

Meanwhile, Tanya has located something at the castle gate, although it is hard to tell what it might be. It is so tiny in size. Aletta joins her, pulling out her handy magnifying glass and spies several pieces of fabric and another of those tiny springs. It seems they are from the tartan of several different clans, the Black Watch and the Drummond. But where did they come from, and why would they be left lying out here?

Now the Saints are getting mighty hungry and we can all hear their tummy’s rumbling away in a most unsaintly manor. The ladies all know that once they start thinking about food, nothing else is going to get done until they feed themselves. I wonder what we can find to eat around here! Oh look, over there by that tent with the boar’s head on the flag, maybe there will be something for us to eat there. Marti pipes up, "Speaking of eating, does anyone know where the bathroom is?? I hope it is close by. All that coffee I had before we left, well let’s hope the line isn’t as long here as it always seems to be back home!

But before we could round up all the saints and the ladies from their searching for clues, we heard the sound of a new song being played, The Rogues. Again another song fitting for the arrival of the saintly ones..... As the last sound of the bagpipes dies off, a rumbling was heard in the distance, growing louder and louder. We all turned…………….

OOPS! That was my stomach says Tanya, all that getting beautiful again makes a girl hungry. About that food... By the way, Steve, you know you shouldn't be jerking your dirk! So what is for supper, I am famished. What have you mighty hunter saints caught and cooked for us princesses? Wild berries is getting pretty boring ya know.
Aletta I thing we have some naked Drummonds and Black Watches running around, let's go see if we can find them while the saintly men finish supper
Kat if you would put some clothes on and Steve would keep his hands where they belong, maybe we could actually get some supper!
Anyway, Marti, you know that small shovel that's folds up which we all brought with us, you use that to dig your own bathroom; be sure to cover it up and make sure no Saints are watching.
Did anyone else see those naked guys dancing a jig or did I forget to take my medicine again?
I am going to lie down now, will someone please wake me for supper?
Look is that PJ riding on Nessie?

It is indeed PJ, happily riding with Paul Bunyan on Nessie's head!! She turns to Paul and says, "Wow, the view from here is awesome!! Just as long as Nessie doesn't decide to take a dip while we're up here........you know I can't swim, Paul!! By the way, do you know how I got out here??? The last I knew, I was on shore yelling that Paul was on Nessie in the middle of the lake, but that darned sure didn't mean I wanted to be out here too!!!!!"

Paul said, "Nessie and I transported you away from all those pigmy-like Saints...thought you needed a break from the wee people!"

PJ then asked Paul to send her back to shore cause we still have to find our Kat; get those "wee" people back to size again, and find out what the heck those tiny springs were that Tanya found. They must be part of the solution to getting everything back to normal again. I'm going to ask Don, Dick, and Danny to look the springs over really well and see what they think they are. If they were marbles, I'd know they were Kat's or Steve's.........they've been losing marbles right and left ever since I met them!!!!!!!!!! Or they could be WHF's..we have so many in that condition!"

With a brotherly hug from Paul, a pat on Nessie's head, and a BLIP after which sparks flew, PJ hit the ground in front of the castle. "Dang, Paul.........you didn't have to throw me so hard! I'm a little fragile, ya know????"

Once again, bagpipes sounded, off in the distance and PJ would have sworn they were playing "When the Saints Go Marching In". Fear gripped her heart, thinking that was an omen of bad things about to happen to all those mouthy little bitty saints in our group! "Tanya, Jo, Pam, Marti, Aletta, Bev, Donna, and all the rest of you Angel women...........front and center, NOW!!! We've got to rescue our midgets from whatever's about to happen. And then again, do we really want to?? We could just go find Kat first!!!!!!! Show of hands, Ladies........which do we do?"

And just at that moment.............................................

With "Nessie" sighted..and then disappearing from view.Dick slipped
away from the group to see if there were obvious clues we had missed
in our search to find Kat.and just maybe the magic spell remover to regain our
height!

Pondering our problem, Dick suddenly remembered that his
great,.great, grandmother had been born in Scotland before later
marrying his Great Great Grandfather from County Clare,
Ireland!!!!!!!!!!!! This sudden excitement meant nothing to the
rest of the group, but Dick thought he just might have some long lost
relatives who could come to help us.

Using his 2-way ultra-powerful TV wrist satellite transponder, he
quickly entered a special coded password. As a child he had been
told that this family heirloom should always be worn, but only used
in a true emergency. "This certainly is an emergency", thought Dick.
so he pressed "Start VISTA" and a question was spoken asking whom
he was attempting to reach. He quickly said the "Ross family in
Scotland.or the Clare clan from Ireland!"

There began a smashing and grinding. sounds of machinery screaming
at ungodly decibel levels!!!

This noise brought the whole VWF gang running..as fast as their tiny
feet could move...to find out what was going on. Dick told them he
was expecting to find a way out of their situation any moment now..
and sure enough an "apparition" appeared..obviously an elderly SCOT
with a well worn old kilt. Eyeing the group, he "ROARED ": "Who is
disturbing me? I haven't been bothered by the Clare's or Ross
families for years.until now"! "If you have a problem, it is my
sworn duty to assist, but if this is some kind of a joke, you'll all
suffer the wrath of all Scotland, Ireland,
and all points in between...."

Dick was as astounded at the sudden appearance of this old Scot, but
thought."maybe if we ask for a short tour of the Isles hereabouts, we
will eventually be led to the final clues we need to bring us back to
normalcy". When he asked the girls about this, they all yelled that
they'd like to hop over to Liverpool, England...to see where the
Beatles first played and from whence they leaped to immortality. The
guys were in agreement with Liverpool as a destination, but Dick said
he had three places he wanted to revisit since the opportunity was
here..They were: Clare, County, Ireland...where Shannon airport was
located...and his ancestors once lived...Second was Birmingham,
England..which he had visited with wife,Jane in 1998 when he was
sworn in as a District Governor of Lions International ....and
Third, and perhaps the most revered place he had visited that year.
the town of "Coventry" England. It was the town about which Winston
Churchill had written: " The bombing of Coventry in November 1940 was
perhaps the most unendurable of all the many bombings the country
suffered through in the entire WWII struggle "!

Well, so much for History: Dick was asked more about how a visit
to these places could help the group in their present
plight? "Well", he answered staring at the Scot who had magically
arrived, sworn to help them..."Here's what we'll do":]

"FIRST, we'll have a fun time over in Liverpool, courtesy of
Angus whom we summoned to guide us safely ahead on this journey."

"NEXT: we'll go to Shannon Airport .and make arrangements to be
sure we can get back home ok without having to go through London's
Gatwick or Heathrow.

"THEN," said Dick, we'll go to Birmingham, back in
England.The "Brummies" as they're called, speak an entirely different
brough than the Londoners and other Englishmen. These "Brummies" are
tough and may very well give us an edge over whatever forces are
casting spells against us!"

"THIRD on my list," he continued, "is a quick stop in Coventry, where
we each may pay our respects to those brave people who died in the
terrible revenge raid of WWII. The cross inside the burned out
remains of the only building that remained standing, is inside,
resting at an awkward angle..Upon the cross is painted someone's
plea: "Father, Forgive Them". Now that's an awe inspiring sight!!

"While in Coventry, those of us who might want to invest in a
factory-new Jaguar can do so," Dick suggested.

"And then", ..."We'll turn back to our
Wrist Satelite System. ANGUS here has provided our transportation
needs so far..NOW we need the release of the spell on us and to
rescue Kat from wherever she may be. Steve watched Dick turn the
dials.and held onto the elderly Scot's old and shabby kilt. There
was a huge burst of rain..a clap of thunder and...............

Poof!!!! We were transported to all the places that Dick mention.. We were in awe at the cross in Coventry while Dick with his magic words of story telling explains little known tid bits about WWII. We were so caught up in his stories we almost forgot about the peewee Saints and Kat. Until the guys said they were freezing in their kilts, it was cold there. Momma Jo spoke up and said enough of this!!!!! We must find Kat, she will freeze in that bikini…and the Saints are very difficult to control being so tiny.. So Dick turned the dial again and poof we were transported back to Scotland to find Kat and the answer to the clues… Dick looks at all the clues and confers with the rest of the peewee fellows…without any luck of figuring out what the clues meant. We all went looking across the fields for a glimpse of Kat. Yelling her name, and the echoes of the tiny voices of the Saints cause all to laugh. Then there were the bagpipes again, we followed the music and it leads us to the castle where we found more springs laying just inside the doorway. There were enough springs as there were saints. PJ said that since there was the same amount of springs as there are Saints, the springs must be the key to them getting back to normal size. So each Saint took a spring, until we could find out what to do with them. We looked high and low for Kat. There was some stairs leading down into the dark, we could hear the faint voice of Kat calling from the darkness.

The Saints all pulled their dirks out of their belts and headed into the darkness, with the angel ladies right behind them. As we got closer we could hear a voice and hoped it would be Kat.  Each passing minute it got darker and darker. Then there was light; it was not Kat’s voice but the voice of a Wizard… As he raised his magic wand the wizard said, ’My name is Yahoo, I came to make your party a unforgettable one.’ Before he could get his last words were out, the saints were on top of him taking his wand away. It took the entire tiny saints to hog-tie him, but they got r done. Then with the wand, they tried make themselves big again. They said every thing they could rhyme to get the wand to work, but without any luck. The little guys made us gals laugh again as their tiny voices. Bev said let's get out of here this place is creepy. Pam agreed and said leave the evil wizard tied and bring that magic wand; we may find a way to use it. So back up the staircase we all went, still searching for poor Kat. As we travel up the staircase, there was a flapping noise. Marti asks do you hear what I hear? At the moment, there was bats everywhere. Jo yelled ,"pull your collars tight so they can get to your neck"...we did as we ran up the stair and back out of the castle. Out side we all stopped to rest, what an adventure so far. We haven't had a food except the Custard cake and the southern dishes Steve brought. Tanya is still asleep. The Saints were still tiny; Kat was still under Brit Bratt’s spell and nowhere to be found. Debby E says listen..more bag pipes then points and yells.........

Everybody hit the ground. Something swooped over them and flew away.

Marti asked "What was that, I thought the bats were bad enough!"

Debby answered, "Don’t know what it was, don’t want to either! We need to find the clues to restore our people. When I was researching this castle, I found that there are special sun dials which tell the time in the European capitols. Seems to me that might be a good place to check for clues especially with Angus along to help us with some of the more exotic ones." And so they started exploring the gardens. This was actually safer with the regular tourists around giving them some protection from whatever their antagonist had in mind.

Bev & PJ, being the sensible women they are spread out a picnic as we all know that men always function better with a full tummy, be they little or big! To the amazement of the not so saintly males, the preloaded picnic even came with some roast (OH MY!) duck! Causing them to do a rather credible jig in their glee at Bev’s consternation.

Betty laughed "Hey, Bev, where did you get that basket?"

"From the butler, where else?"

Debby giggled and shook her head. "Guess you don’t read a lot of Scottish novels, Huh Bev!"

"I just told him absolutely no Haggis!" Causing the "Little Men" to roll on the ground laughing. "And if you don’t stop that and eat, you won’t get any lunch."

Pam was watching the guys thoughtfully and murmmured. "If they were wearing green suits I'd say they look like leprachauns, but what do you call little kilted Scots?"

As they finished their lunch and packed all the leftovers into the basket, Debby began examining all the different Sundials touching various parts every now and then. Finally she yelped "Got it!" and held up what looked like any other flat black rock.

"Got what?" Danny wanted to know.

"This little boring looking rock is what they call the lode stone. It can absorb and neutralize all sorts of magic."

"Then we can fix things as soon as we find Kat!" exclaimed Jo

Well all the guys are ready to go find Kat and start running around saying hurry hurry we are tired of being small.

It is not easy being as wide as you are tall says Danny looking at Steve. Dave and Bill are just laughing at how funny Steve looks and Bill says he looks like an egg with little legs and feet...Danny has a long stick in his hand--well it looks long to us little people, and he pokes Steve with it and makes him fall down. Steve has hard enough time standing as it is being short and round. Steve is laying there on the ground crying and trying to get up and Aletta says to Marti to go and pick him up, so Marti runs over and snatches Steve off the ground and it is a funny site. Jo says just look at Steve on Marti's hip with his little feet waving back and forth. Well after Marti gets Steve settle down, off they go to see if all of us can find our Angel Kat.

Steve is squirming so that Marti has to put him down but holds his little hand to keep him from falling again.

Danny and Dave say they have to go around the side of the castle to take care of business and off they go. As they round the edge of the castle they bump into a little green man...Danny says ..Who are you. and he says I am Leppie the Leprechaun and Dave starts laughing and says this is Scotland, not Ireland. Well ole Leppy says that he has come here looking for an evil wizardess that has stole his magic. So Danny and Dave say come with us we may know where this evil person is and off they go to meet with the others.

When Danny starts telling the group who this green fellow is all the Angels are just jumping with joy and start talking all at once--as all women do---

Bev has been trying to fix her hair and didn't hear any of what the others heard and now Jo has to tell her over again.

Jo shows Leppy the Lode Stone and he says "Ah ha just what I need to fix all wrongs and make everything right. Deb E. and Deb B. tell him where they found it and off he goes into the castle.

Pam, Donna, Dick and PJ are down by the lock looking for Paul and Nessie but as they start to turn to come back to the group heavy clouds start building and Tanya says we may get some rain..........

We all shook from the thunder as the rain fell. We could see the wizardess standing with her staff as the rain fell. Suddenly Steve yelled out "look at the wizardess". She's melting. As she completely melted away all the saintly good guys began to grow, hoping to return  back to their orgiginal size. BBB and WHF yelled out "that will teach that ol bag to mess with mother nature". The girls looked at us saints and shuttered thinking they are in big trouble for suggesting to Kay that she shrink us. Before we returned to the castle BBB made all the girls bow to us saints and ask for our forgiveness. Steve suggested we return to the castle and have a BBQ were all the girls will wait on us. Back at the castle Steve started up...

Once in the castle the girls take over and try to get everyone to help find Kat. Finally Dave and BBBill locate her tied up in an old trunk in the scullery. "Oh thank God you've found me!" says Kat. She looks at  Steve who thinks he is big now having grown a mere 3 inches and says "I know how to get you back to normal size....while I was trapped I could read Wizardess Bratt's mind and if you'll please help me to Wizards Knoll behind the castle gates I'll do my best to get you to your full size...even your head Steve...Promise!" We all troop out to Wizards Knoll. Kat tells us to keep away and to go on with our plans to go home.

As a wee tiny Steve stands in the glow of Angel Kats' presence atop Wizards Knoll. Kat quietly tells the VWF family to go on home. That she will be there with Steve before they all arrive at VWF headquarters. As we look at our Angel Kat she places a hand on Steve's tiny forehead the glow begins to brighten..Don taps the Wizard's Stone four times and says TweedleDum...a humming is heard. Pam, PJ, Jo and Betty look one last time to Wizard's Knoll and as they watch, Kat smacks Steve on the top of the head and the glow brightens to a blinding light.....CRAAAAACK! POP!...we are back in VWF.

Sitting at the table (set for high tea by Kat) is a full sized Steve, head and body fully restored. Next to him with big cup of coffee is Paul Bunyan, big smile in place holding a glittering rainbow colored scale from Nessies tail. Paul says," I thought that this would look mighty good on the mantle at home. Princess Patti will sure like it!"

"Hey y'all!...let's have some of this wonderful food she's made for us." Says Steve. As we sit down to enjoy the tea cakes and scones, custards, bon bons, sugar plums, brownies and many other special delights. Marti, Tanya and Aletta sit right down next to the tea cakes rubbing their hands together. Tanya says, "WOW! this sure beats Haggis!". Kat comes in from the Corner wrapped in an authentic Black Watch Tartan, with a tall drink of Haig and Haig Scotch and two slices of Lemon Custard pie..."Hey PJ! You all made it back in one piece! Have a slice of custard pie! I sure wish I could have come this year. I must have missed you all by 10 minutes at the most! Jo, you really DID mean you were going to leave on time this year. Did I miss anything? "

At that last question, Danny's mouth drops to the floor..."Why Kat! We had the most interesting time and..... don't you remember being there with us?" Kat gives him a wide green eyed stare..."NO! but tell me about it." Then, every one starts talking at once. THE NOISE!!! Bev gets the Big Stick out and taps it on the table and says, "Ladies and Gentlemen! Please!" Wildman grabs a glass of iced tea, laughs and says with surprise, "You really don't remember a thing do you Kat?"

"Now Kat sit down this is gonna take a while, says BBBill, Let's start at the beginning.... "

As we tell Kat about all that went on in bonny Scotland and of the wonderful time we shared with the Drummonds, Nessie, Old Angus and Leppy, of visits to musty old places, hallowed places where our fallen heroes lie and of helping our wee little kilted men on this years vacation we wonder what lies ahead for us on our next Spring Vacation...(Kat hears a psssssssst! and looks over at Pam, who pulls up her sleeve to show Kat that she's got the wizards wand. Kat just winks and smiles.)

Thus we return back to our normal lives, having lived in the fantasy world for one weekend out of the year and bless our Angel Kat who started this whole tale.

The End

Summary of this adventure as follows:

ODE TO VWF AND SCOTLAND

'Twas time for the party!  VWF was ready!  
The Saints were marching but weren't too steady! 
Their kilts, stockings, sporrans and dirks 
Were all in place as were the ladies' smirks!  

They were in Scotland, the men shrunk to size small
Kat disappeared and Paul said 'Hi y'all!'
Wizardess, clues, bagpipes, clans, notes, and springs,
Bikinis, Angus, mind boggling things!

Many adventures, many sharing this show,
Wildman, Steve, Bill, Danny, Tanya, Kat, Jo.
Pam, Marti, PJ, Bev, Deb B, Dick and Paul,
Betty, Aletta, Don, Deb E - think that's all!

During this time there was much confusion 
As the gals in the group tried to reach a solution.
How to find Kat, decipher clues - that's not all,
How to make the short guys once again tall! 

It's time to go home, to leave Scotland here, 
And it is O.K. to shed a happy tear.
It all feels like an impossible dream,
It is an incredible friendship team!

On Danny! Bev! Tanya and Deb B!
On Marti! Kat! Pam! Don and Deb E!
On Aletta!  Dick!  Betty!  Jo and Paul!
On PJ! Steve!  Wildman! Bill!  Had a ball!

From out of nowhere came the bagpipe's strain,
It sounded like **"Will Ye No Come Back Again"!**
In a poof of green, Leppie though short stood tall,
"You're welcome to come to Ireland in the Fall!"

They ran to the plane, made sure all were there,
Taking their memories, their stories to share.
The Wizardess exclaimed as they flew out of sight,
"Happy Birthday to VWF-have a great flight!"

Written by Betty Davis

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vwf-2007